Everyone knows that there are a miriad of changes that happen to you after you have a child. You sleep less because you worry more. You get crazy excited when your baby poops after a three day dry spell. You become frustrated when you take your child to their 6 month checkup and they still haven't gotten their first tooth like your neighbor's baby did. You become depressed when you take your child to their one year checkup and they still aren't standing up and walking like your friend's kid is. And you become downright devestated when, at your child's two year checkup, they are not talking up a storm and trying to hold regular conversation with you like your little niece or nephew was.
After you have a child you no longer think about wether or not eating a cracker that fell on the floor is a good idea or not, because your kid has already picked it up and is halfway through it. And that little spot of crust on your jeans or the splash of juice/milk/coffee on your shirt that would have had you rooting through your closet before heading out to the store? Now you don't even notice it. And even if you DO notice it, you really don't care. If you think about it at all you're just happy that it's not poop or pee. But on the right clothes pee dries clear, so whatever - at least it's not poop.
So many changes happen to you once you have a baby... Eventually, as the months go by, you get used to the crazy changes in emotion and thought and actions. Your new 'mommy' persona starts to level out and you think that the worst is over (at least as far a drastic personality changes go). Then your baby becomes a toddler. Then you have another baby, who also becomes a toddler eventually, and all the while your first toddler is becoming a little kid. Fast forward to the part where your have a one-and-a-half year old and a three-and-a-half year old. Welcome to my world.
So many changes have happened and are happening to me that I don't even realize how I've changed (or even that I've changed) until much, much later. When I do realize something, it usually comes in the form of a realization while I'm having my morning coffee, like today.
What was today's realization, you ask? I'm glad you asked.
Today I was sitting at the computer, drinking the aforementioned coffee and checking my email. I heard a thump come from the general direction of the living room, followed by another thump. I sat with my ears perked for five seconds or so and didn't hear any more thumps or any crying to go with the first two thumps, so I said 'oh well' in my head and went back to checking my email. That's when it hit me - I have become completely ambivelant to loud, out of place noises that are not immediately followed by cries/screams/etc. With two children that can walk, run, climb, jump and roll, I have come to mostly, if not completely ignore thumps and bumps. If a loud noise doesn't involve louder crying or glass shattering, I don't even bother to check on it. I figure whatever it was can wait until I'm done washing the dished or folding the laundry or putting my youngest daughter's room back in order for the second time today.
The ironic thing about all of this is that I have, and have always had the ears of a fox. All of my life has been spent trying to drown out or ignore all the teeny, tiny little noises happening all through the world so that I could concentrate on getting things done or getting to sleep or whatever. I have always overheard conversations from a different room or even across the house, because my ears are that good. I can tell you exactly which direction the ice cream truck music is coming from, and I can find a person in a crowded room just by listening for their voice in the jumble of conversation happening. I have spent my entire life trying to figure out how to drown out the white noise all around me, and then it happened without me even thinking about it. All I had to do was have kids. Hilarious, right?
